For those of you who don’t know me I am known “Tootsie”, a name my Opa gave me. I lived with my Opa and Oma for the first six years of my life. My Opa was so very special to me. Even up to a few days before Opa passed he just called me by Tootsie. I would like to share some of the memories I have . The last couple of days before he passed he talked about me riding Bob the Bull. I guess when I was 4 Opa would put me on a bull and let me ride atop of it. He had this memory of it still to his dying day. Some of the things my opa taught me was how to fish. I remember Oma , Opa and myself loading into the truck with the boat attached to the back and head out to Burnstick Lake. I have such vivid memories of how opa would show me how to tie the fishing line and cast. All three of us would sit quietly on the boat and eat our dutch cheese sandwiches and wait for a bite. It broke his heart the day my mom got married and I left his home to live with mom and dad. It broke his heart so much so he offered my dad a whopping $1,000 to just walk away. My dad didn’t of course. Later on I remember meeting him out on the island and going fishing with him there. Now that was scary. Opa smoking, with an open gas tank, sitting in a very small old boat on the ocean. I remember going to oma and Opas all the time and Opa telling me to go into his pocket. There I always found the salta drops. We both had a shared passion for the double salted licorice. I couldn’t wait to get there and share in his droppies. I still eat those darn things like they are going out of style. I remember Opa taught me how to bartend. He taught me how much alcohol was two fingers worth. He also taught me how to hide that second two finger drink he liked from Oma. I remember both of us grabbing spoons of butter and rolling them in the sugar bowl and popping it into our mouths. On that same note we would do the same with sour cream. I couldn’t join him with his boiled potatoes and buttermilk or the Raw hamburger and raw onion sandwiches. I drew the line there. I remember during harvesting Oma sending me out with a thermos of juice during the day and coffee at night with cheese sandwiches and usually buttertarts or sugar cookies. I would walk across the field till Opa saw me. I would hop into the tractor or combine and ride around with him till he finished his lsnack and then walk back to the farm house. A lot of those times Opa would get me to drive while he sat back and ate his snack. He usually yelled at me and cursed me for going too fast or not straight. I remember sitting to the left of him on my stool during dinners always. I remember the lords prayer in Dutch that was always said. I remember how opa taught me to drown kittens when some were born and their mother abandoned them He taught me the “Use two half buckets method” which I had to use on my daughter Vanessa’s hamster when it was very ill. Maybe because I grew up with Opa or maybe because we are so much alike but his yelling never scared me. His cursing and hollering never scared me. I stood up to him. I knew he would never hurt me. I knew that was my Opa and my opa had the biggest heart of gold. I wish more people tried to understand him. I wish more people spent time with him to know him instead of judging his gruff exterior. When Opa died a huge part of me died too. With Opa being gone a lot of things will change and a lot of things will never happen again. I loved going to the farm and showing my kids where me and my cousins would play in the hay bales or where we would play in the barn. The farm is where I learned so much and had such memories of. An end of an era is gone. Opas last wish of dying on his farm was taken away by selfish people. I pray for one day being able to forgive these people. I want to end this with a poem A heart of gold stopped beating Two shining eyes at rest God broke my heart to prove He only takes the best. God knows you had to leave me But you did not go alone For part of me went with you The day he took you home. To some you are forgotten To others just part of the past But to me who loved and lost you The memory will always last